Walked to work- some photos from our neighborhood's rendering of Fall... 

Being able to walk into town from our little neighborhood brings me such joy.  Trampling through these leaves, looking at how secluded we are down in the valley, seeing my neighbors offering their tiny libraries, hearing trains and traffic passing overhead on the bridges and byways. 

Additionally, then I get to walk home, and it's quiet and a time of transition- preparing me slowly for the next part of the day.  

Clem and I loaded up in the car for a quick run to Trader Joe's for last minute stuff before her uncle comes to visit for the weekend.  Then, we continued on to the Spokane International Airport (we are only 70 miles south of the Canadian border!) and went to meet uncle's plane.  We parked in what they call the "cell phone waiting lot"- first time using one and I love it!

These pics are a bit excessive, but show you what fun we had while waiting.

Something that worries me and also delights me is the notion of a limit...where is mine; do I have one/multiple; what happens when one is reached; is there something to pay attention to beforehand; what lies beyond; are there different limits for different facets?  All of these are questions I ask, all the time.

I read the transcript of the Republican debate tonight- their second*- and you would believe I wasn't part of the electorate or part of the American fabric.  I didn't hear any hesitation, any introspection, any questioning of virtue or merit or worth or ability.  I am haunted by that.  Why am I feeling ALL of these things and others are soldiering on?  I cannot call them ignorant and myself the sole sanity in our humanity!  Rather, I can call them simplistic, and I can take on what is complicated and confusing.  Toiling with the undetermined, willingly?

We watched "Show Me a Hero" recently.  And I keep coming back to it.  It sounds like it was about a great activist, committed to integration in Yonkers, NY.  In actuality, I think the young mayor was solely focused on being more than just his person- executing his persona.  He did it, but what was the price and was there falsehood within it all?  How does social justice evolve judiciously?

To be fair:  Show Me a Hero is one of the best things I have ever seen.  Ever.  It asks what I am asking, while taking a stance and while being true to the complexity of the issues it addresses.  I have mad love and respect for David Simon, HBO, and Oscar Isaac :)

*I mistook their second for their third.  Story's been getting on a bit...

Literally, moments after I posted my intention about this blog and my first blog entry, I came across this AMAZING TED TALK about exactly what I am trying to do as an adult connecting, retroactively, with my purest self.

Is the world, truly, unfolding as it should?

We drove West from Indiana- headed to Washington for my husband's new job.  We picked up the puppy he got me for my birthday in Sandpoint, Idaho- an hour and a half from our final destination.  It was a gorgeous beginning.

And now we're a few months in, and I'm wondering how I fit into the whole thing.  What will my vocation in this new place be?  It all gets very existential very quickly.  Do I have a purpose?  Within this context?  And then existentialism creeps into anxiety...do I fit here...will I feel at home at some point...am I doing alright?

So, I have decided to start exercising some of those feelings outwards- hoping to develop a habit of writing, thereby righting my course and getting a little closer to self-actualization and who I am meant to be.  It isn't supposed to sound so self-indulgent.  Rather, it's supposed to carry a tone of earnest self-discovery and thoughtfulness- I apologize for any unwanted by-products.  

And your role?  Read, comment, call me out, recommend books and movies and personal experiences that have moved you towards your true self.  No man is an island, and this girl can use all the community I can get.